Simply Thankful

I don't blog about my relationship with my boyfriend much. I talk about my life here, but not so much the relationship.

I don't blog about him because it is an important part of my life that has been a challenge this year... and therefore a more private subject for me.

(That or he'd just make everyone else's boyfriend look bad... ha jk jk (kinda)).

The challenge however seems to be decreasing a great deal lately... as is the sensitivity ;)

So taking a look back...

It was more difficult than I presumed it would be going from dating long distance to living four blocks apart.

It was a challenge to realize how many differences in personality he and I have.

It was hard to make real life/big decisions about things when we were only in the fairly new dating stage of our relationship.

It was seemingly impossible sometimes to figure out how to communicate given our opposite ways of doing so.

.....

I think our dating relationship was kinda like taking a kid out of preschool and throwing he or she into high school :)

I would be lying if I said I have never thought about coming home, that we have never been frustrated, or that this year hasn't taken a toll on both he-and-I.

It has.

We have learned and continue to learn a lot, and the whole process was/is humbling.

So yes, the relationship itself has challenged us.

What's interesting though, is that almost this entire time the most difficult thing for each of us has been to watch the other one struggle, without feeling overwhelmingly accountable for that struggle ourselves.

What the heck do I mean???

When you move across the ocean for someone, or when someone moves across the ocean for you... it's a big step, a really BIG step. A step that brings a number of difficulties... that don't even have anything to do with our relationship itself... but can and did feel like they do.

As odd as it sounds, this is what I think has been most challenging thing for us to work through.

My billions of emotions that have come with being far and uncomfortable and jobless/houseless/carless. His learning to make big decisions and lead our relationship. My own journey of feeling lack of friendships, being surrounded by boys, and getting to know his family. His entire schedule being changed and providing time for just the two of us when he already has lots of people in his life... etc.

I can say with all confidence that the majority of the challenges I have faced since moving to Hawaii would have happened if I had moved here for any reason. But when "the reason" is clear (to be with my handsome man:) to both he and I, it brings a difficult aspect into the relationship.

An aspect I would best describe as guilt.

Guilt when things are hard, when anything is hard... because you are always overly aware that this transition has cost both of you a lot already and continues to do so.

It is much easier to let yourself struggle than to watch the person you love struggle. Fact.

And to-be-honest, its a lot more fun to just be that exciting long distance person whose phone call makes his/her day and whose trips are absolutely incredible, than to be the person who costs money, time, emotion, and energy. Not real life, but more fun.

Don't misread what I'm writing. I don't think guilt is the appropriate response per se...  just that it was sort of the natural one in this case.

I think guilt resulted because there was ZERO amount of transition time from one stage to the other for us. One day I was in St. Louis, working my own job, living with my family, etc., and the next I was here without knowing a sole and pretty much reliant on Richard to help me figure it all out.

Holy crap, no clue how we both didn't just run during week one. It was a lot.

And following this big transition overnight, we had the adventure of deciding seemingly everything together... from where to eat dinner, to what kind of apartment I should search for, to what was the best cleaning spray, to what shoes went better with my outfit (because I didn't have anyone else to ask for awhile ha:). It was our adventure, but it was a lot of details.

(Kidding about the cleaning spray though... did that by myself thanks ; )

Please remember, up until this point in our lives, neither one of us had really EVER had to make decisions like this together. Ever. Our dating in college was mostly long distance and just a whole different thing anyway.

.....................

All that to say, as we approach my one year mark for my moving here, I can't help but look back and feel kind of proud of the two of us for not giving up along the way. (I also can't help but laugh at the obvious things that made far more hard than I realized at the time).

I don't know anyone else my age who went about this stage of dating like this. It's kind of intense and it has taken a lot out of both of us.

And... we don't have everything figured out. In some ways I feel like our year of transition has exhausted both of us to the point where we are just trying to get back on track---back to "normal" life instead of transition mode.

I realized the need to get back to a normal mode about a month or two ago, and have been putting more effort towards doing things with female friends or on my own. I've really been prayerful about my outlook of being here and my focus (aka God, not Richard.. shocking, I know).

And guess what??

God has truly blessed that.

This stage of taking a step back and making some changes and being more independent has been amazing. For the first time in a year I have started feeling like myself again, felt like I have a bit of my own life here, and don't feel so weighed down by trying to make my relationship perfect all the time (fyi: guilt = lots of pressure to make perfect:).

.................

Yesterday Richard and I went to the beach together.

We didn't have to have any intense talks along the way, we didn't feel a constant pressure or guilt in our time together, we didn't have any communication issues, and we didn't get into any stupid arguments.

We just enjoyed each other.

(which no, this isn't the first time that's happened;)

But let me tell you... there isn't anyone I enjoy as much as him.

He makes me laugh by being his big goofy self.

He listens so well and gives good thoughts.

He tells me about things he is interested in (and repeats himself anytime I tune out:).

He swims with me and builds sand animals (not a joke.. its fun... shut up.)

He is considerate beyond what I knew anyone could be.

He is attentive and sweet.

And well, a day like yesterday reminds me that balance in relationships is good and that all the little frustrating details simply don't matter at the end of the day when you enjoy each other that much.

.... and I was reminded of all these things yesterday. We spend lots of time together, but yesterday seemed special because there was nothing else we had to do, no one we needed to meet up with, or any big decision we had to discuss.

And in my (slow) growing independence (which does scare me a little:), I see it all in a new light: Thankful to have had the challenges to grow us, and thankful that we both have worked through things together and learned along the way.

Simply Thankful.

Don't worry... Richard built our turtle a protective barrier so the water would not get to him!

:)

Richard made us dinner... yum:)  

I am VERY thankful to feel like I am starting to have my own life here too--so that I can just enjoy his companionship and not depend on it every moment of the day:)

Before I moved some wise friends and family encouraged me to try and build my own life here as soon-as-possible. I see now why that's important and I'm thankful I was provided that advice (though it took awhile to follow:).

So yeah, that is my blog about Richard and me.

We still have lots to learn, but it feels like we are finally getting to the really fun part--or at least past the crazy beginning transition part:)

All glory to God who has walked us (or pulled us) through each step of the way.

I am more excited about my life here than ever, am loving meeting new girls, and am excited about just enjoying my relationship with Richard right now:)

Packing is a sport...

I have been blessed to have the honor of being asked to participate in two more weddings this summer.

Both are such a treat to be able to even attend, given where I live and all, because each of the brides are very dear friends to me.

In case you start to think I'm one of those really cool chicks who is asked to be in like four weddings every year, think again, (not about the cool part, I am cool:). As was earlier discussed, I tend to stick close to a few good friends and that's just kinda enough for me.

Well, I should explain though, a few are enough because the people in my life are incredible. I swear, I know the greatest girls in the world.

Back to the point though...

Of the few girls whom I'm close enough to to really really REALLY not want to miss their weddings, these two happened to get engaged around the same time.

And it's possible that bride # two strongly considered this weekend so I wouldn't have to fly back-and-forth... which is a gift, because I couldn't have flown back-and-forth.

Point being (YES, there is a point, relax!!!!), I'm currently preparing for a two week trip, to attend and be a part of two weddings.

Which is incredible and I couldn't be more excited if I tried...

However, packing for this... is a bitch.

I am taking one checked bag that weighs less than 50 lbs. Shorts, jeans, hair stuff, jewelry, shirts, yada yada yada... in addition to an ass load of sundresses. One might think, two weddings = two dresses... but when you actually start doing the math of the luncheons, parties, rehearsal dinners, and weddings themselves... they add up fast.

Yes, I can certainly wear the same thing twice (and probably will). But given my ability to spill things on myself, the lack of laundromat access I will probably have, and being in humidity for the first time in a year (aka probably going to just walked around drenched... gross, I know), well it's hard to depend on wearing something more than once. And of course I'll need shoes to go along with these things. Awesome.

This is like a big math equation. (Not as big as the time change/layover/flight time math equation... I mean talk about a real bitch...).

Ummm.. okay, that's all I really have to say about that.

It's not a big deal. Frankly I'd wear the same outfit everyday just to get to be there for it all!!!! But it will be interesting to see how if the suitcase meets weight limit requirements ; )

So I like to think that this type of packing is a sport... (b/c that's a nicer title than "packing is a bitch":).

Faithful

For my friend Hannah Beth--a girl whose heart for the Lord is one of a kind, who I grew to love so quickly, and who I have missed every day since she moved away,

As you go through the pain of healing from your surgery and any other hurts on your heart, remember that you are dearly dearly loved; by me, and far more by your God.

Remember that God is holding you in His hands even when it doesn't feel like it; especially when it doesn't feel like it.

Remember that you are His wherever you are and whatever you are doing.

Remember that in your weakness you can rest in His strength.

Remember that He will get you through this and that you will be better for it.

........

These lyrics have brought me comfort on some tough days, and I pray that they will encourage you to stay strong as you get through this painful time.

Love you friend,

"Faithful"
By: Brooke Fraser 
There's distance in the air and I cannot make it leave
I wave my arms' round about me and blow with all my might
I cannot sense you close, though I know you're always here
But the comfort of you near is what I long for

When I can't feel you, I have learned to reach out just the same
When I can't hear you, I know you still hear everyword I pray
And I want you more than I want to live another day
And as I wait for you maybe I'm made more faithful

All the folly of the past, though I know it is undone
I still feel the guilty one, still trying to make it right
So i whisper soft your name, let it roll around my tounge,
knowing you're the only one who knows me
You know me

Show me how I should live this
Show me where I should walk
I count this world as loss to me
You are all I want
You are all I want 

Scratch that idea...

My last post was about sleeping more, doing less, and finding more balance.

I haven't even come close the past few days. Crap.

And no, I'm no more sane or energetic than I was a few days ago. Sleep will do the trick, I know!

I tried!! I swear. But like I said, I haven't been this busy with good things and enjoying it in a long time... so I'm gonna go with it. I mean there was going to the beach with friends, watching Harry Potter with Richard (or falling asleep while he watched it:), dinner with friends, errands to run, things to clean... yada yada yada.

I haven't even gotten in my workouts that are generally my top priority, (CRAZY, I know).

So new plan: scratch that idea till I get back from my trip in a few weeks. Too much to do, too fun to pass up on... just going to embrace it.

I will resume balance goal at a later date. This is called accepting momentary defeat... something I don't do... ever... so I'll consider it a sign of maturity:)

Balance

Okay so lately I feel like I'm in chronic vacation mode. Which would be cool, except that the vacation mode is also combined with real life things like running errands, working, and actually sleeping on occasion.

Or at least it should be that way.

The tricky part is allowing oneself to enjoy this place without getting so completely worn out by keeping an unrealistic schedule. Up until the last few weeks, I have been able to do this because honestly, I didn't care all that much about doing anything in particular. 

I don't have that much actual responsibility. So don't hear me complaining about being overloaded on that front. But I do have some, and also recently increased passions for being active, doing fun things, and staying up late far too often. (Rough life, I know). 

Now I just must throw this out there... I technically had a degree which included a "health promotion" concentration. Yes, they do in fact let people study something like that in school. I loved studying it, and I actually think it provided me some amazing tools for life (though perhaps not as many for income:). The basic focus of my studies was how to help people take care of themselves despite challenges from whatever lifestyle they are living. Nope, not rocket science people. I'm supposed to (and like to think I am) a pro at knowing how to be creative and make goals in order to be and stay healthy. 

Confession: sometimes I'm a slacker. Right now, I'm a slacker. Not by any astronomical means... but by my own standards. I don't try to reach perfection in my habits (I'm actually against that idea), but I do hold some high standards for myself. Why? Because I know how to do it, I know the consequences of not doing it, and I really do enjoy when my schedule and lifestyle is contributing to my health. 

It's like a dentist not taking care of his or her teeth. It sorta makes me nuts when I'm not doing the things I learned, or at least attempting it. 

Who cares about all this??

Probably just me. But with the trips this summer, the visitors in town, the even warmer weather, the change of my work schedule, the still trying to pursue a fun dating life and grow in our relationship, the getting to know more girls, the planning for my next trip (in only a week mind you), the entertaining three kids several hours a day, the trying to keep up with a bunch of boys all the time... Well, it's gotten me fairly exhausted.

So slow down, right? Stop complaining and do less and get more sleep, right? Ultimately yes, but not as easy as it sounds. 

Here is why it is a challenge: This is the first time in almost two years that I have had an actual desire to have enough going on in my life to keep me occupied.

So despite being exhausted... this is a good sign. Because for a good portion of my post-college life and living here I had lost a lot of my desire and motivation for life. With the transitioning from school and then to here, I just sort of shut down and tried to get by with it all. 

Richard and I were discussing the other night how I take great comfort in relationships with people I am close to, but that I can be fairly uncomfortable around those I don't know that well. And it's true. Leaving college friends and then my family has, to some degree, kind of broken my heart. Such is life--but true all the same. 

So now, as I realize at some point in the last few weeks I started doing TOO much because I actually WANT TO do what I'm doing... I'm pretty excited. About freaking time, frankly. 

But this brings me back to issue #1... I need to slow down, to rest more, and to take more time to be still. Because it's amazing to have a new excitement for life and all, but as with all things, I need to find some balance. Balance so that I don't go nuts. 

Balance that IS starting this week... mark my words. Though I can be a slacker, if I come to terms with a bad habit forming I try to kill it fast. So more sleep it is! 

A Sweet Reminder :)

Every once in awhile, when I can get a break from my over-thinking self and just stop for a minute and look around... I realize just how much I love this place in all its' beauty. 

If I'm not focused on myself or a task or some issue I'm determined to solve, and I just take a glance at this place that's (slowly) becoming my home, I'm quickly humbled by how incredible the scenery around me is. 

When I first arrived in Hawaii my friend Sarah asked me what I was most thankful for when it came to my new residence, (apart from Richard that is:). My response is the same today as it was 11 months ago... I'm so thankful to live in a place that will not allow me to miss God's glory. 

Sounds silly, right? It's just a wave or a mountain or a sunset, after all.

But for me, a girl who is so easily distracted and often won't stop moving, a girl who grew up around ministry and all that entails--it is a blessing to live in a place that is SO beautiful that I simply cannot go that long without stopping in awe of what is around me. 

This is nothing short of a great gift. No matter how absorbed I am in my own agenda (and let me tell you, it's often WAY too much), Hawaii puts me back in my place. 

This place is my very sweet reminder that I serve an incredible God. A God that is so attentive to detail and vast in nature. A God that cares about little things just as much as big things. A God that is creative in more ways than I can imagine. A God who knows all, sees all, and has a plan for all. 

A God that I know. A God that loves me. 

When I look around the beautiful place where I live, all the little things that get to me too often fall away from my mind, and I stop, just for a moment, and realize that I am "home" because I am loved and cared for by the same God that formed everything around me. 

This is not a God who is lost on the details. This is not a God who forgets. This is not a God who is inattentive. 

This is MY God. A God who should be trusted, respected, loved, adored, and glorified. 

When I look around I feel like the luckiest girl in the world. I'm loved by this God, and everything else falls back where it should be....  just small details of life. 

Details that hold some weight, but not nearly as much weight as I give them. 

Just "details", because when you are loved by a God like this, nothing else really matters. 

:) 

I Am Free.

Okay, so if you read my post from yesterday in which I proceeded to rant about nothing and sound like the very fallen person I am, then I'd like to follow up with my thoughts from today.

I tried out my theory and let myself be upset and frustrated and whatever else (rather than trying to fight it or feel bad about it). Turns out it actually is a great idea, and sadly one I've never really really approached before.

Why was it good?

Well because I learned that all my frustrations are valid and that my fears and thoughts and feelings are completely accurate to who I am and the life I live!!

Not.

Not even kind of actually.

But it was a good idea because it allowed me the freedom to not be perfect and to cut myself enough slack to see myself as I really am--a mess for stupid reasons.

Feel like I'm going in circles here?

That's fair. I kind of am.

But here is what I'm learning... I can't control the way I feel or my insecurities or areas where I lack maturity or perspective. I may know that I'm being ridiculous, but if I try and talk myself out of my weaknesses, I just end up accentuating them.

Frankly, I get very frustrated because most of the time I know better than how I feel... and this is incredibly annoying.

For example, I know that when my feelings are hurt by someone, more times than not, it wasn't intentional. I know that as fact because I have been well loved and treated pretty well in my 25 years of life.

Yet the side of me that is sensitive and empathetic by nature (and irrational at times), still reacts to what's happening, whether harm is intended or not. In-other-words, I still feel the hurt.

My reaction to having feelings that I don't think resemble truth is to experience guilt because I "know better". I know that the person loves me, I can understand why the person acted that way, and I know that it wasn't meant to hurt... so it shouldn't right? And if it does, then I'm at fault and should feel guilt or shame.

Wrong. This is where I "shoot myself in the foot" all the time.

If I feel hurt, rational or not, I have to let myself feel it, period. (Note that I said "feel" and not "dwell").

Should I act off of it? Very rarely. Is it probably unnecessary to feel that way? Most likely. But if I try to reason or guilt my way out of my feelings, than I just end up storing it up for another time and FAR more frustrated with myself and the situation than I should be.

So what happened after I just let myself be upset or whatever yesterday?

I got it out.

I let the emotions (ridiculous as they were!!) run their course, I shared them with Richard and a friend, I felt relief and comfort, and I let them go.

Did you hear that part?? I LET THEM GO.

Shocking, I know. But letting the emotions go is amazing because it gives you the ability to think more wisely and relax much easier instead of just being weighed down.

Ladies and gentlemen there is hope after all:)

This is what I think the Lord may be teaching me right now: I feel a lot. All the time. I can do my best to make wise decisions and surround myself with encouraging people so to minimize unnecessary hard emotions, but at the end of the day I'm going to feel a lot... and that's just the way I am. I cannot control my emotions, but they don't have to control me (think I probably subconsciously stole that line from some cheesy book at some point...).

The problem, is my approach to feelings... trying not to have them and feeling guilty along the way. It actually just makes them all a bigger deal than they need to be.

So my next theory...

If I can just trust God enough to be broken and have the feelings I do, then all the effort I put into being something else or better or having it all together or understanding them might not make these emotions carry SO much weight in my life.

I might even get the silly ones out faster and move on quicker.

I might be able to recognize and act in wisdom when the emotions I have are a blessing.

I might have thicker skin and not be so sensitive to those in my life.

I might experience freedom in life and relationships.

I might be able to give more freely without feeling the need to stay guarded.

I might think of others before I think of myself.

I might learn that perhaps God created me the way He did to use me in a certain capacity that I don't yet understand.

I might let go of little things and just be in the present with greater ease.

And I might... just maybe, find my sense of joy in simply being me and loved by God.

...............

But I think the guilt/shame have to go first. People hear the words guilt and shame and they think someone is either in the wrong, has been wronged, or is feeling that way unnecessarily.

Well I'm all of the above.

Frankly, I am fallen and live in a fallen world, and often my emotions are rooted in sinful and selfish desires, are reactions to someone else's sin, or are simply irrational.

But regardless of the cause of this guilt/shame I carry, I also serve a God who forgives, is far greater than I, covers all that I do, provides for me so that I don't rely on others, and therefore I am not bound by these things.

I am not bound by my mistakes, by my weaknesses, or by my sin.

I am not bound my my circumstances, by other people's actions, or anything else.

I am free.

............

This truth has been present since the day I asked God to be the Lord of my life, but to really allow it to shape me and change me, I have to believe it and need it enough to ask for God's help--to surrender my life to Him in a new light.

I'm not positive, but I think it's possible that me getting to this place in which I feel broken by this issue, I perhaps needed to be in the middle of the ocean, away from my comforts, uncomfortable in my surroundings, and completely clueless about where my life is going and what's next.

In short, perhaps I needed to be overwhelmed enough that I couldn't shut my emotions off, find a short-term outlet, or talk myself out of them.

Perhaps Hawaii is EXACTLY what God intended for me.

Funny how I thought I moved here just for a relationship with a guy and, God continues to do SO much more than I could have imagined.

All to His glory.

That's what I learned from having my bad day ; )

My "freedom pose"... okay not really (I'm not that nerdy). But I was looking over a HUGE cliff here that you can't even see. Was sorta cool and calming like my thoughts about all this:) 

Everyone deserves a "bad day"...

Today was crappy. Bottom line.

I woke up in a bad mood, tried to walk it off (for 8 miles... didn't work), felt a mess the whole time, and then watched kids who felt like this was the PERFECT day to be especially difficult.

The only highlight was catching up with people I love via the phone while I walked. That I can appreciate.

Oh and getting some fresh avocado from the maintenance guy at my apartment building this morning. Incredible.

Other than that I could have easily passed on the rest of it.

Why such a mess today??

Who knows. Lack of sleep, hormones, missing my family, feeling insecure about my job, worrying about making enough money to take two weeks off at the end of the month, frustrations with dating life, not taking time to rest over the past month (fyi... "resting" doesn't just mean not working. Sometimes I think working more would actually help me sit still and be less worn out.... just saying), communication issues with Richard (what?? he should be able to read my mind and meet my every need at all times... that's not unreasonable!! :), not running (I've been slacking this month and I can tell I need my outlet back... probably the biggest issue sadly), etc. etc. etc.

Stupid things, really stupid, that build up and when combined result in one really, REALLY bad day.

Perhaps I have infant-like syndrome where I actually try to do more when I get slightly tired (like I'm trying to keep myself awake by being MORE active because I hate feeling tired), and then I hit a wall and crash.

Well people, today I hit that wall and am crashing.

Like an infant, this stage also involves me being unable to hide any emotion (something I'm normally bad at but worse in these cases), incredibly irrational, easily upset, and unable to remember ANYTHING or form complete sentences (like a worse version of ADD... fun). Side note: if you think I just described my regular personality, tell me a different day please;).

Oh and feisty. Very feisty. Not like, "oh that lady that just stole my parking spot is bothering me" kind of feisty, but like the "I might accidentally bump her with my car once she tries to cross the street" kind. (Okay, okay... I'd never actually do that... reeeeeelax).

Unfortunately I'm no longer two-years-old so this mood/reaction/attitude is not acceptable or slightly cute... just irritating.

Which brings me to my next bad habit: I tend to be hard on myself all the time. So on these types of days when I'm aware of how I'm acting (like a brat, in case you missed that), and when it annoys me but I seem unable to snap out of it, then I just get more frustrated.

No, sadly I'm not being dramatic. I really am this big of a spaz.

A better solution would probably be to just let myself have a bad day instead of rationalizing it or trying to fix it or understand it. Just to be a mess and not care. I'm always impressed with people who do this gracefully. Not for long stretches of time... (those people need to be slapped), but for a day every now-and-again.

My theory is that maybe, just maybe, if I can learn to let myself have a bad day every now-and-again, to let the things that bother me bother me, and the frustrations to frustrate me, than maybe these negative emotions won't build up as fast or at least worsen as the day goes on. Not to dwell in that state, but just feel how I do with freedom to do so for a few hours. Be ticked off or upset or whatever... but just be that way and not trying to fight it or be better. (Shout out to Court... ).

Because truthfully, I'm not any better than that. I am a spaz, overly emotional, and a very sensitive person who probably needs some thicker skin, (workin on it!!:). However what I also am is blessed to have friends and family who love me through it, blessed to have a boyfriend who is steady as a rock, blessed to serve a God who let's me chat to Him all day everyday, and blessed to have so many good days, that the bad ones stick out so much. I am blessed. I know this and I am thankful. And I think that if I let myself be a mess sometimes, I would perhaps not care so much. And that would be good... a relief really:)

.... those are my random thoughts. Today was rough for absolutely no real good reason at all, but who cares. Tomorrow will be better:)

Wedding Highlights...

So I know everyone loves the beautiful and sentimental shots from a wedding... myself included, but I already posted a ton of these and so I figured I would share what I think are the real "highlights" of the occasion. These would be moments that made me smile because they are what makes my (growing) family, my family. When I say "family" I am included our dearest friends as well... without whom my actual family might never get through exciting and crazy events such as this:)

Nate trying to figure out what he "should" be saying or doing (jk... I don't really know, I wasn't sitting close enough to hear:) 

The hour I got to steal my new sister away... which I secretly wanted to do the entire trip. 

Gathering the family together to figure out last minute plans (what?? we need centerpieces??)...  

Matt's reaction to me making fun of him at the rehearsal dinner. 

Just a quick lunch with my mom and grandma.. :) 

My reaction to being asked to take too many pictures. 

Lael's odd infatuation with the hired musician.. lol. 

Chuck giving one of his good hugs. 

No caption really needed.  

Dad getting shut down. 

Rehearsal dinner speech... on the verge of tears. 

Mom finding time for a garage sale on the wedding day... 

Lael's ever-so-aggressive flower removal process lasting throughout the ceremony. 

The "quality time" Jordan and spent together driving to Chicago.

Grandma trying on sunglasses on the way to the airport. 

That was the wedding through my eyes... or at least the random/stupid little moments that I loved. 

On a more sincere note... it was an incredible wedding. I'm very proud of Nate for the man he has become, for his choice to pursue and love Liz and Lael well, for his growing sensitivity, and for the very strong character he displays through all of the above. 

I also feel honored to have a new sister who seems to be such a beautiful and strong woman, mom, and now wife. She continues to impress me with her love for Nate, joyful spirit, and fun personality. I only wish I lived closer to have more time with her:) 

Congrats again to Nate and Liz!

Finally, I must just say... thank you to my God who continuously provides, protects, and prepares my family for the life He gives us. To say I left the wedding overwhelmed with thankfulness would be an understatement. In good times (such as this:), and in bad... He always shows up with His glory and His plans, which FAR surpass anything I could have constructed myself. This wedding was just another example of how blessed we are to be loved by Him.